'Back Off Mary Poppins' - Season 2, Episode 1
Alan learns that Charlie belongs to an exclusive men's group, and he begs his brother to let him join.
Air Date: September 19th 2004.
Charlie: A friend is someone you choose. A brother is someone you get.
Alan: Excuse me?
Charlie: There's no choice involved. Your dad just wakes you up in the middle of the night and says "Your mother wasn't really fat and this isn't your room anymore".
Charlie: (Talking about Alan). When he came home from the hospital everything was about the baby. Don't wake the baby! Don't tease the baby! Don't paint the baby!
Alan: Call mom now.
Charlie: Let me just get my phone. I have her on speed dial 666.